One thing for sure, I'm realizing that I really want a sisterhood. Homeschooling has shown me that while being a Mom has its perks and responsibilities, being my daughter's friend and sister is equally important. Of course I want to share with her and love on her, but more importantly I want to get to know her.
Get to know the true her. Not the Amoni I wish for her to be or the Amoni I need for her to be, but the Amoni she is. And I'm finding out that she really has an awesome head on her shoulders. Her critical thinking mind is amazing. She's so retentive. What took me 8 years to know and forget is taking her a weekend to retain. Learning and remembering with her has given me a joy I didn't know I needed.
As a woman, I remember people saying and showing me that being a woman meant that you should become this Superwoman-type creature who will, unfortunately, in the end become full of regrets because you really never quite do what you're supposed to do for yourself because the world needs you to do for them more. We as women have sometimes become a one-woman-show.
There was a time when the fad was to be the great and powerful "Independent Woman" with all the bells and whistles!! Have your own and don't rely on anyone. Now I'm wondering... who wants that? I know I want to share my gifts, objects, love, affection, money and time with someone and to be honest I am truly blessed to have that with my husband. But what I think my heart cries out for the most is a true sisterhood.
Sisters, to me, are very sacred. They're closer than best friends and are required to protect and love on each other always. They definitely may not get along all the time, but in the end, because they truly know each others hearts, they're there. In this society were shown and taught about friends, enemies and even brotherhoods.
Every once in a long while I'll stumble upon some books on sisterhood or I might even catch a lyric in a song about it, but it's not steady or consistent like the brotherhood concept.
Loving on my daughter in a sisterly way has allowed me to see her as an individual, just like I feel when I'm with the sisters that I have adopted in my life. I wish that there was just more of it. I wish there was a mandatory time in my life when I could just get with my sisters... flaws and all, in a no judgement zone, but with a platform to talk and just listen and heal.
I know I'm healing and accepting myself more from this experience, but I guess I'm just putting in the atmosphere my hearts desire to build and learn from human being who look like me and are shaped like me and have similar thoughts and feelings like me and we could get together and learn and grow stronger together. In many brotherhoods, I've heard that iron sharpens iron. Well how about us ladies coming together and recognizing that fact too.